I've never wanted to kiss a man so much. There's just something about someone who saves my Fantasy arse week after week. This time Aguero, whom I shall captain until the mountains crumble to the sea, netted me a thoroughly Thundercats 32 pointas thanks to two goals and an assist. He didn't even play the full 90. What a hunk. So that's 'Captain Marvel' sorted for the rest of the season, then. Shall we focus on something a little more pressing like which players you're getting in to lace Sergio's boots?
Buy Low
Aly Cissokho (4.6) -- Aston Villa | LEI (H)
No need to search your brain's Sissoko banks - he's the very same useless plonker who spent last season on loan at Liverpool. His time at Villa Park has been marginally less embarassing - he's started every game this season including their five clean sheets. He's yet to score any attacking points and if anything is technically on -1 goals this year after he spooned a clearance into his own net against Arsenal. He's only got one yellow card to Alan Hutton (4.2)'s three, however, and is a relatively inoffensive choice in his price bracket if you've already been canny enough to pick up the likes of Dummet and Trippier. He's also buttering up the BPS system real nice - his 15 pointaloons bagged him the Man of the Match gong to make him one of the highest-scoring defenders in mid-week. Let's hope that's a warning shot and we're jumping on the bandwagon before the band.
Warnings: Important Stuff
Sell High
Angel Di Maria (9.6) -- Manchester United | SOU (A)
About a fifth (19.6%) of Fantasy managers still own ADM despite the fact that his poorly hammy has restricted him to 13 minutes in the last two games and has him guesstimated at 25% to play against the Saints. He's a quality player no doubt but is about as helpful as a pitch invader if he's on the bench or physio table so don't sit on him and let his value - not to mention that of your team - plummet. Think of all those lovely xmas pressies you can get yourself with a few extra coins and the points you'll be missing out on from Hazard, Fabregas or Oscar in the meantime. Does he even know it's the Christmas schedule? Stingy bastard.
Fool's Gold
Pappis Cisse (5.7) - Newcastle | CHE (H)
A goal and a MotM display and he's back in business, right? Wrong. Super wrong. Super Mario Balotelli re-tweeting racist cartoons wrong. As we've been saying, this Ayoze chap has real talent - he's more than a mere pants-filler and needs to be accommodated into the Toon attack. Papa Papiss also has a medical history that makes Darren Anderton look like Brad Friedel. That said, when he plays more than 45 minutes, he invariably scores. So if you can somehow look into Alan Pardew's head (I wouldn't - you might find all sorts of unwanted nasties), he may be worth a shout. Otherwise steer well clear unless you want a nasty surprise - especially with Chelsea, Arsenal, Man Utd and Everton all in their next four.
