Have you ever been en route to see a film you were really excited about and the guy/girl/noone cause you're lonely you're going with just whinges about how crap it's going to be and totally negs the vibe? Well that's how I feel about the upcoming Double Gameweek. The general consensus lies somewhere between "There's a double GW?" and "meh." and Spurs may have lost the Milk Cup final on Sunday but they did so with great pluck against the best side in the country, who won with two deflected goals. They also face two smashable sides in Swansea (H) and QPR (A). Meanwhile you won't want to look further than Charlie Austin (6.3m) to satisfy your Rangers contingent - the rest of the well runs well dry - but the Rs' main man yields plenty to be excited about and can easily break double figure points in home ties against Arsenal and Spurs, who have just six away clean sheets this season between them. The overall uselessness of English sides in Europe and the surprisingly mild winter weather also means double gameweeks are unlikely to crop up in the future - aside from Chelsea and Leicester's in GW 34 and it shouldn't be too much trouble to get three Chelsea players and zero foxes in your lineup by then. I actually think this week could be such a game-changer that I've finally cashed in my Wildcard. If you're wearing pants of which you're particularly fond, you may wish to disrobe before scrolling down because this team is filthy dirty 50 shades of cray.
Buy Low
Danny Rose (4.9) -- Tottenham | SWA (H), QPR (A)
Spurs haven't managed many clean sheets this year but there's a direct correlation between Danny Rose playing and the number of goals Danny Rose scores. He has two in his last seven and loves to bomb forward with reckless abandon. For a defender who costs bugger all that's decent going. Spurs also only face two of the top four for the rest of their run-in. Do it.
Correlations: Important stuff
Sell High
Alexis Sanchez (11.4) -- Arsenal | QPR (A)
Those of you who pay REALLY close attention will notice I dropped sexy Lexi for Hazardously good at football. This is a big move and one made not without hesitation and deep consideration. I have Chelsea's match in hand and consequent Gameweek 34 double firmly in mind, though, and it freed up some funds to allow me to keep Sterling and upgrade the recently-stifled Downing to Eriksen. I'm not saying he'll be a flop going forward but Cazorla's getting it done thanks to his pen duty, is considerably cheaper and has a much sillier hair-face combination. That's important to me.
No es bueno, Santi, pero me gusta
Puntsville, USA
Moussa Dembele (5.2) -- Tottenham | SWA (H), QPR (A)
NOT a nailed-on starter for Spurs but one of their more dynamic options in midfield. Mason and Bentaleb make them tick but Moussa brings the tock. He scored against Liverpool, came off the bench at half time and helped claw back a 2-0 defecit against Wham and was rested for most of Sunday's final so might be back in the starting line-up for his seventh game in eight. Not baaad actually. Not. Bad. At all.
