Gameweek 23 saw Leicester, who are three points clear at the top of the table, and Spurs, who have the best goal difference and best defence in the league, finally become title challengers. Go figure. Meanwhile Arsenal started their inexorable March decline a little early this year and Man United's greatest achievement this season is commissioning the cast of Ratatouille to make a cameo appearance in their shock stock home defeat to Southampton - by far the most entertaining thing to happen at Old Trafford since David Moyes dubbed Liverpool favourites for the title. Chelsea are OK again. Everton score goals but can't win games. Norwich are perfecting the art of clutching defeat from the jaws of victory. City are KDB-less for the foreseeable future. The FA cup happened, I suppose. And January transfers are January happening... a bit. Now that we're up to speed, it all points to a both-balls-out double-single of Gameweeks 24-25. One week brings us two chances to bring in points. Two chances to captain Aguero. Two chances to sell Lukakucakes - but I'll come to that later...
Welcome to Mouschester: Home of the world's snoriest luxury football team
Buy Low
Bobby Firminyo [pants] (7.9) -- Liverpool | LEI (A)
Numbers, unlike Sarah Palin, speak for themselves. Firmy's bumper fantasy returns of 13 and 18 points in the recent matches against Norwich and Arsenal resulted from crazy pavings scorelines but that doesn't mean scores like that won't be normal for him if Klopp can bring out the brattwurst in the young Brazilian.
A definite fixture blank for gameweek 27 means a double gameweek on the horizon for Milk Cup finalists Man City and Liverpool. There might not be any need to overload your Looperville quotient straight away but you should at the very least start building towards having three players from each team whenever that DGW lands. Hold off on that wildcard until we have more fixed fixtures, though.
Fool's Gold
Patrick van Aanholt (4.7) -- Sunderland | MCI (H)
PvA is a defender... who costs 4.7... and has scored in four consecutive matches. Shit's unreal. But Sunderland haven't kept a clean sheet in any of those four games. Will they keep a clean sheet in their upcoming tests against Man City, Liverpool and United? Will they fuck. Don't get seduced by glitz, glamour and fiery lasers. PVA might look like an X wing fighter of a Fantasy wing back but you'd be much better off with a good old reliable Kia Rio Ferdinand-type (a man who scored an average of a goal every 55 games but still brought in defensive returns galore). Go for Ivanovic (6.5) if you've got the dosh or Targett (3.8) if you're on a budget and thank me when you've got a couple of clean sheets to rub together.
Sell High
Romelu Lukakucakes (9.1) -- Everton | NEW (H)
Nothing to shout about fantasy-wise in four games and he's still taking up a sizeable chunk of your monies. Swansea at home wasn't the bonanza we were expecting and neither was the unexpected 3-3 with his alma mater Chelsea. Plus there are budget options all over, with Enner Valencia (5.2) finally returning from injury and cracking new transfers like Afobe (6.1) looking the mustard. It's scary to drop him at home to Newcastle but you've gotta take the plunge some time. Don't be chicken.
Watch this space
Adebayscore (5.8) -- Crystal Palace
Palace's new recruit has the potential to be Fantasy platinum. Provided he doesn't knock Pardew's block off for insinuating he's a bigger man than him, or piss on the groundsman's favourite squirrel, he could be in line for some banging fantasy returns with a quality midfield propping him up.
Pic of the Week
Kick off in this gaffe at your ego's peril. Burn. [binoculars optional]
