So it's come down to this. The final furlong. If you've followed all of our advice this season, you're probably sitting pretty atop your mini-league, in which case the best advice is to cockblock like the trixy mo-fo you are and bring in the most dangerous player of whoever's snapping at your heels. If you're more of a Roger Federer win-with-panache kinda FPL Manager, or you're just a plain old loser (2nd place and below, I'm talkin' to you), here are some hot picks to make a difference in that crucial final Gameweek.
Captain Marvel
Olivier Giroud (8.7) -- Arsenal | ASTON VILLAGE (H)
As always, Arsenal have been mathematically out of the title race and underperforming since April. As always, they have an easy home tie to finish the season on a meaningless high. As always, they're going to win that game 8-0. And no game has ever been quite so 8-0 as this is going to be. Filthy Sanchez is sure to have a field day but he's the obvious choice. Get Olive-oil-hair Giroud leading your line and he may well reward you with anywhere between 2 and 47 goals. He might even get an assist. Just don't hug him afterwards. He looks greasier than Megan Fox on a slip n' slide.
Buy Low
Dusan Tadic (6.6) -- Southampton | CRY (H)
The Saints have been marching towards Europa League spot semi-glory recently with some scintillating stuff against Spurs and Man City, and Dusan Dusan is right behind it all, the tricky little minx. He just scored 35 points in three weeks, yet still has only a 6.6% ownership. If that's not a recipe for the man who's gonna win you your mini-league, my name's Jesus (it's not).
Sell High
Liverpool generally | Doesn't matter
Klopp's lineups are about as predictable as North Korea's policy on Brexit. Surely though he's not gonna start any 'starters' (whoever they are now) this close to Wafer Cup possible glory? Shirely you can't be serious...
Fool's Gold
Christian Eriksen (8.6) -- Tottenham | NEW (to the Championship)
If ever there were a case of false advertising it's this guy. Plays for the sheckshiesht footballing team in the league, has shot-per game stats that whet dreams are made of, and has a pre-heated already-relegated Newcastle to play with this weekend. He's got a low ceiling, though, with assists providing his dankest points (16 assists v.s. 6 goals). Also Spurs have been erratic since their title challenge went to the Foxes. You're better off with Tadic, even if you can afford Son of Erik.
Pic of the Week
A wise man once said, "If you're on the interwebs, always finish with a picture of a cat."
It's been a pleasure writing for you this FPL season. If you're a fan, and would like some Euro 2016-based Bantasy Football to keep you going this summer, please Tweet your interest and/or abuse (but make it funny) @BantasyFootball.
