The first double of the evening is so delicious. Just before everything starts to get out of control and go tits up. It's ostensibly so manageable - you think you know what you're going to get. Really, though, wouldn't it be great to have a friendly helping hand to usher you up the mountain of uncertainty? Well here at Bantasy we'd like to be your double Gameweek sherpa - starting with DGW34, which is tantalisingly spread out over 5 days and is sure to contain everything from the sublime to the ridiculous.
Captain Marvel
Zlatan (11.4) -- Manchester United | BUR (A) & MCI (H)
DISCLAIMER: I obviously wrote this before Zlat decided to turn his knee inside out. If he's fit, great. If not, I guess you're stuck with Bentekkers.
There's disquiet in some camps about the benching of Z-dog against Chelsea but that was a very particular game against a very particular foe, and Ibrahimovic should be playing every minute he's fit from here on out. Rashford is a card but King of the pack he 'aint.
EVEN if he doesn't start one of the two games - EEEEEVEN then - I'm not even worried. The last time I made a decision this easy I was 'deciding' whether to continue bingeing on Geordie Shore and double fudge brownies or to fetch the remote from all the way on the other side of the room and 'inform' myself about whatever bullshit 'democratic' event happens to be clogging the news right now.
In Zlat's first two games back from suspension he quickly notched up two scores and an assist. Rust just don't accrue on this badmans. Bang Bang.
There's no need to fret about a slightly trixy fixture against City either - Ibra's what the NFL Fantasy aficionados refer to as "match-up-proof" and in any event the Manchester Derby isn't exactly cagey. They have only shared three goalless draws in the Premier League era.
United looked flush against Chelsea and will be brimming with confidence now that a Champions League berth is theirs to lose. Use that hubris to your advantage - double up on double Zlat attack and get a buttload of points.
Buy Low
Stewart Downing (4.9) -- Middlesborough | BOU (A) & SUN (H)
Usually if the answer to the question, "Is it 2007?" is "no", you should not have Stewart Downing in your Fantasy Football team.
However, one could not ask for a much better double gameweek fixture couple than already-relegated Sunderland at home and a Bournemouth side who have just had their back doors smashed in by a rampant Spurs side. Confidence gone.
Downing can put in peachy crosses like nobody's business and he found the qua-li-teh Negredo with a beaut curler on Monday.
His price is also limbo low and can facilitate some of them spicy moves you wanna make up top.
And if you've planned this all out correctly, you'll be wildcarding soon and can cut ties with Stu after the DGW so no dramas. Make the most of a sweet spot while it's ripe then buy whatever you want with all that free-flowing cash moneeeey.
Buy Anyway
Paul Pogba-- Manchester United | BUR (A) & MCI (H)
As of last weekend, the player with the most completed passes in the Prem is... you guessed it... Mathieu Debuchy. Oh wait, whoops, I read that table upside-down.
#Pogback never really went away this season - his shots per game (3.11) are almost as good as that of Sanchez (3.32) and higher than Son's (2.32), as are his chances created and key passes - he's just not had too many Match of the Day moments. His goal tally is low and he hasn't got the sext appeal of the other mid-high-priced mids but this makes him a whopping differential - only 7.7% own him in FPL, 99% of whom probably had him at the start and haven't changed their team since.
He's also just about the only forward-thinking United player guaranteed a start - and the uncertainty is supreme with recovery from an important Anderlecht tie on Thursday for José to consider.
When big players come good, they come hard. Phrasing aside, that's a mantra to live by.
Sell High
Raheem Sterling (7.6) - Man City | MUN (A)
A lot of players deserve the chop this week (Costa, Siggy and Blanky McAuley spring to mind) but none more so than Raheeeal disappointment Sterling. With a singular lonesome goal in 15 matches, the former starlet has fizzled into an even duller prospect than before his last dusty spell.
Sterling's inability to finish his dinner, translated directly into a lack of attacking returns, hasn't escaped Pep's attention and playing time has diminished as a result, with only 45, 12 and 5 minutes granted against Arsenal, Chelsea and Southampton respectively.
There's no space for losers like this in your Fantasy lineup, certainly not ones costing 7.6m without Double Gameweeks until GW37. Get your ZiggaZigZaha on. Have a Hererra. Heck, take a ticket to Townsend town. Just don't have this fool as a starter against United, even if it means a 4 point hit. It's emergency operation time at this stage if this guy's floating around in your system.
Fool's Gold
Josh King (6.0), Bobby Firmino (8.6) & Pip Coutinho (8.5)
Speaking of fools, what kind of fool would pick up an item which is BOGOF, and say "nah, fo real I'm cool with just the one Wagon Wheel."?
The same kinda jacked-up nonsense merchant who might be in the market for a player with a bunch of single Gameweeks when Double Gameweeks are larking about with reckless abandon, that's who.
Exciting talents like Zaha and Ibrahimovic are gonna be on fleek this week and looking further forward it'd be handy to have some Arsenal players for their back-to-back double double in Gameweeks 36 and 37 which can ride your team directly into the sunset.
So the likes of King, Firmino and Cthulhu, all of whom have 33 matches in the bank and no tasty double dips coming up, can take a back seat and sleep, spill Quavers on the carpet and/or watch Finding Nemo on repeat in the headrest TV for all I care. They're not going in my FPL team and you can't make me.
