The trick with wildcarding, and life for that matter, is not to be too much like Jim Morrison.
Jim Morrison would have played his second wildcard straight after the winter break, with no double gameweeks in sight.
You, though, canny as you are, have saved it for the perfect time to strike. Below are the two best options but in my view the first takes the mustard.
Nevertheless, we iron out the kinks of each tactic so you don't have to make mistakes which could haunt you.
THE FACTS
The two most important things to consider when deciding when and how to play your FPL wildcard are as follows:
The weeks that have double gameweeks
The weeks that don't have double gameweeks
- Bantasy Football
Simple, right?
So here are the teams y'all need to know about:
Gameweek 34 - The amuse bouche
Manchester United, Crystal Palace and Middlesborer have double gameweeks.
West Brom has a BLANK.
Gameweek 35 - The infuriating break between courses
NO DOUBLE GAMEWEEKS.
Gameweek 36 - The super salad starter
Arsenal and Southampton have double gameweeks.
Gameweek 37 - The prime rib main course
Double Gameweeks for: [Deep breath]
Spurs
Chelsea
Man City
Man Utd
Arsenal
Southampton
Leicester
West Brom
Watford
Gameweek 38 - Pudding (make sure you save space)
NO DOUBLE GAMEWEEKS
All this means you want to focus your efforts (and probably your bench boost) on Gameweek 37.
That doesn't mean you should ignore the bounties available in earlier weeks, though, and a triple captain on Sanchez in Gameweek 35 could pay serious dividends.
THE OPTIONS
OPTION 1 - WILDCARD NOW
This is the ultimate panic button. You've waited this long - don't waste your most powerful Fantasy Football weapon on a double gameweek which best player just genuflected backwards like a dying flamingo.
This move is for the desperate and the insane. You've waited this long... just hold your boner one more week.
OPTION 2 - WILDCARD IN WEEK 34/35
This is the sweet spot. It allows you to carefully craft a lineup fit for the remaining schedule and means you can cash in on any chips you have in the following weeks (REMEMBER: You cannot wildcard and play a chip in the same week!).
Build a team that is - or by week 37 can - be entirely doublegameweekers - then SLAM! Hit em wit' your bench boost for ultimate rewards and ride into the sunset triumphant on a gay Jewish unicorn.
OPTION 3 - WILDCARD IN WEEK 35/36
This option is also acceptable, but not ideal if you have more than one of the big daddy chips (triple captain and bench boost) still to play. You want to maximise those badboys.
It's also worth bearing in mind that the earlier you WC, the earlier you can get those duds out of your team and spring for more in-form options like Josh King, Heung-Min Son and Marcus Rashford.
OPTION 4 - WILDCARD IN WEEK 36/37
If you want to ensure that your team is absolutely completely and utterly Optimus Primed as possible for Gameweek 37, this is the time to play your Joker.
Drawbacks include missing out on most of the fun prior to GW37 and only having dem fresh new team feelz for two weeks before the season ends.
It's not the best way to maximise the returns available from the new FPL wildcard/chips system, but hey - some people just aren't ready for 2017 I guess.
THE LOGICAL BREAKDOWN - BORING BUT TRUE
Looking at this simplistically, the FPL manager wants the largest possible number of points and there is undoubtedly a powerful positive correlation between time played and points accrued.
Therefore FPL managers should all be looking to maximise how many matches their players play.
The best way to do this is to wildcard early, once s/he is in full knowledge of the double gameweek schedule, and tailor the team to ensure that it can catch as many double gameweeks as possible, without taking too many points hits, and without excluding must-have premium players in non-Gameweek sides.
West Brom are the only side with an upcoming blank, so that's not a problem, and the only truly elite player who doesn't play twice in GW37 is... there isn't one.
So hit that button at 14:01 today (it's a late KO for GW34) and start trading up - make a sneaky profit then line your pockets with points snatched from the jaws of FPL managers who have timed their big move poorly. That was all a bit serious so here's that silly image about frogs who love cookies you've been searching for:
